The Masthead (That's not a very good description of one of the most intricately plotted and carefully constructed masterpieces on the 'net, but it will have to suffice for all you people who are using a text only browser.  And if you one of those people who supress image loading, don't.  It will just lead to an ulcer.)

Welcome to another edition of the Online Murphy Times where we chronicle the continuing adventures of that intrepid Murphy Family as they struggle against the relentless forces of reality.

As always, please E-Mail us here at Remember, all such E-Mail will become the sole property of the Murphy Family and will not be returned, even if you say "please". It will, however, be replied to -- so don't say I didn't warn you.

NEWS FLASH: Denise wins election to the Country Lane Woods II board of trustees in a landside victory!

In this edition (12/14/96) we find the Murphy Fearless Leader discovering that its a jungle out there, the Other Murphy Fearless Leader remembering why she retired at 30 in the first place, and the Fruit of the Murphy Loins eagerly anticipating a big haul this Christmas.

In honor of the season, the following picture is provided:

P.S. No, this is not our house

And now, in no particular order (except I'm first) we provide our regular columns:

Its a jungle out there!

Kevin's View

It's a jungle out there, make no mistake. At the flying bomb factory where I work, we are busier than Santa's Elves as the first flight of our latest offering, SLAM ER, approaches on February 13 (mark that date on your calender). And as its the "holiday season", we are at our busiest at home, too. In fact, the contrast of the fullness of December with the emptiness of January causes a rupture in time so great that a year is required to span it. At least all of this activity takes my mind off the central fact of '96 -- I turned 35. Yes, it's a jungle out there.

A Cabin would go perfect here

Denise's View

Instead of retired at thirty -- breathing the mountain air, listening to the whisper of the wind through the pine needles, admiring the lake view -- Denise is handling claims part-time for Malls. Gone are the idyllic days of summer with daily pilgrammages to the pool. Her husband Scrooge sent her back to work to make Christmas money. This is on top of her volunteer retirement activities. She is the assistant leader of Erin's Daisy troop at school. And as was reported elsewhere in this edition, she is a trustee for our subdivision. Maybe if she could collect Social Security like other retirees, she could stay at home and enjoy her well deserved retirement. Too bad she can't get a senior discount either.

What's cuter than a lion cub?  Two lion cubs!

Kid's Korner

The anticipation of what Christmas morn will bring.

Erin is enjoying her half day kindergarten at Carment Trails. Kyle is enjoying his one day a week stint in a Mother's Day Out Program (a relic of Denise's retirement.) Everytime we pass the church that it's at, he points out "there's my school" (translated from the Kylese.) Both kids are thrilled with the approach of Christmas. What a difference from my childhood where hours were required to buy a tree, this year we set a new Murphy Family record with the purchase with about five minutes of looking. They both had fun helping Mom and Pop reach the lower branches and fighting over who would hang which ornament. At least the younger generation of the Murphy Family continue the traditional arguing over how to decorate the tree. The steady advance of the lamb in the advent calender is cause for great delight since they know when it reaches the end, the Big Guy in Red makes his appearance leaving behind a bag full of toys for good girls and boys.

Return me to the OMT index, please.

lift and separates

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Contents copyright Kevin Murphy 1996. All rights reserved.