Today we toured old town Lausanne. And that meant we had to go uphill. And uphill some more. The Fruit of the Murphy Loins were beginning to understand what this trip was all about when they kept asking why we couldn’t drive there and we kept replying walking was easier, and then just “we’re walking”.  We would rest on the benches at the bus stops, but we didn’t consider resting on the seats on the bus.

When at long last we reached the Cathedral, we couldn’t go uphill any more, so we started back downhill. Kyle then informed us that going downhill was actually harder than going uphill. It was only later that we would appreciate the easiest thing to do was sit on a park bench and eat an ice cream cone. I could have done that all day if I didn’t have to leave the hotel and walk to an ice cream stand.

FRONT DOOR OF CATHEDRAL IN LAUSANNE, BOY HOPING FOR PEW TO SIT IN

I was very impressed with the old part of town, and I don’t mean that part built around the turn of the century as I would in the midwest. The Romans came here to rest, relax and leave behind ruins, so it’s only natural that Edward Gibbon wrote his classic “The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire” here as well. I especially liked the interior of the Saint Francois church, conveniently located in Place Saint Francois, which was light and airy on the inside despite the massive stone construction and the automatically opening massive bronze door. They also had this very charming eaterie called McDonalds that we ducked in for some liquid refreshment after our vertical ascent of the town.

GILT FREE INTERIOR OF SAINT FRANCOIS CHURCH

After a long day of going uphill and downhill and seeing buildings older than dirt, we straggled down little dog street (it sounds better in the original: rue de le petit chien), and eventually to our hotel where we collapsed in the AC. I didn’t care to walk with a map in front of me all the time, and so on occasion we might not have taken the most direct route, but we got to see more scenery that way. And that’s why we went there. If you want to take the most direct route, stick to American towns where the innovation of straight streets meeting at right angles was first discovered and actually put into use. Don’t go to Europe where the concept of a straight line was not discovered until 1967, far to late to implement in their cities.

We returned to Ouchy that night for dinner at the same pizzeria we ate at the night before, only this time Erin accompanied us. Also this time Kyle and I tried the salad bar and discovered, in his own words, they sure do like cabbage over here. We had fun just hanging out at the lake front after dinner along with lots and lots of other people. Oddly enough, we felt like the only tourists in town — we figured that Switzerland would be full of tourists in summer, but we were wrong, which just goes to show that there’s a first time for every thing.

KYLE WINNING AT CHESS

A crowd of older men and, during our stay, four American tourists hung out at a large outdoor chess board with large wooden pieces at the lakefront. After carefully watching the games and noting that the players were prone to making mistakes, Kyle actually played a couple of games and won them both. At times the onlookers would get quite animated, and during Kyle’s second game one gentleman looked like he would suffer a stroke if Kyle didn’t move his bishop instead of his rook to block his opponents pawn from the 8th rank. Kyle moved the bishop and won the game a couple of moves later. We both thought it didn’t matter which piece he moved, as long as he moved something there, but we didn’t want to create an international incident. Well, at least not that early in the trip we didn’t.