Here’s the hour-by-hour narrative of how I fared:
Tuesday, Election Day, noon. I think I’m pretty safe today. There won’t be a projected winner until sometime tonight, so how can I find out who won the presidential election if nobody knows? Still, I take precautions. No checking out those news sites on the web. This cuts out CNN.com, MSN.com, the BBC, and the New Zealand Herald.
Tuesday, 1:30pm. I discover that if I’m very careful, I can surf the web. I can look at Mt. St. Helens, Longs Peak, and some weather stations. But all it will take is some “news ticker” across the bottom of the page and I’ll be outta the game!
Tuesday, 3pm. I need to look up where is Bari, Italy. Do I dare use Google? Google has a big check box in honor of Election Day today, but no news ticker. Whew! Bari is on the Adriatic coast near Brindisi. I’d like to go there.
Tuesday, 4pm. I overhear some talk from Daran in the office next to me. “All the states are still gray.” No winner projected anywhere. That’s good for me.
Tuesday, 8pm. I overhear Christine talking on the phone that “it could be weeks!” That long to figure out who won, huh? It sounds like things are close.
Wednesday, 6am. I really gotta watch it today. I realize that there will come a time when I know that we have a winner, and another time when I know who that winner is. Or will I find out in one fell swoop? Who knows?
Wednesday, 7am. Off to work on my bicycle. Ack! There’s the morning paper at the end of the driveway! That probably contains THE ANSWER. Carefully I walk backwards to the paper, and locate it with my feet. I pick it up behind my back, and carry it there to the front door. I drop it inside, keeping my eyes averted. That was close. Too close.
Wednesday, 7:05am. As I ride out the driveway I see two women taking their morning walk up the street. They’re talking! Every conversation holds danger for me! Danger!!! I tighten my ear flaps and quickly ride out of earshot.
Wednesday, 7:30am. I get to work early, and there is nobody around. That’s good. But Graham kept me up last night, and I need a cup of coffee. Oh, no! What do you think people talk about around the coffee pot on the morning after an election?!! But I need that coffee! I decide to risk it.
Wednesday, 7:35am. The coffee is not made yet. Drat! After several agonizing minutes watching the stupid coffee machine take forever to produce one measly cup of coffee, I scurry back to my office with the hot cup of coffee in hand. Safe!
Wednesday, 7:40am. Suspecting that the news might leak in through Daran’s office next door, I close my own office door. Just as a precaution.
Wednesday, 7:47am. My brother Michael in Utah sends me an e-mail. The subject is: “Results (not yet)”. Do I dare open it? Yes, I told him that I was playing this game, and I think he’s playing it too. He merely informs me that he doesn’t know the results yet, and that he carefully did not unfold the newspaper this morning. Whew!
Wednesday, 7:56am. Another e-mail from my brother. He says “Oh well, the conversations filtered over the wall. Presidential results known at 7:56 AM.” I tell him that I’m holed up in my office with the door closed, desperately trying to keep the news from leaking in. I feel like the proverbial Dutch boy with his little finger in the dike.
Wednesday, 8:13am. Yet another e-mail from Michael: “Oops! I guess that the results in the presidential election are not known yet.” Ha!
Wednesday, 8:27am. I’d really like to see how the Alan Keyes – Barack Obama Senate race in Illinois turned out, but I don’t dare look.
Wednesday, 10:24am. Michael (my ‘safe’ news source) reports: “At 10:09 AM MST the news filtered over the wall that one of the candidates had conceded.” Hmmm. Generally that means he lost the election. I wonder who it was, Bush or Kerry? What’s going on out there?
Wednesday, 11am. I’m having lunch with a friend in the company cafeteria. The cafeteria! That was a dumb idea. Andy has been sworn to secrecy, but the whole company has not. Looking out the window, I don’t see anyone wildly celebrating. Or jumping off the roof, either.
Wednesday, 1:30pm. I can’t believe it! I made it through lunch! Andy and I found a nice quiet corner away from everybody else. He did tell me there was a concession this morning, and there will be an acceptance speech shortly. Andy said he could hardly believe that Ralph Nader won! Riiiiight . . .
Wednesday, 2:03pm. At the beginning of my 2:00 meeting someone says, “I was out electioneering yesterday. But we won’t talk about that any more.” Knowing this person, I’m pretty sure the remark means that Bush won.
Thursday, 8:24am. A new day. And I still don’t know who won the presidential election! I’m pretty sure it must be George Bush, though, based on people’s moods. Known Bush supporters are pretty cheerful, and known Kerry supporters are kind of subdued. I also think there would be more talk of “transition” and some excited or cynical speculation if we were going to change presidents. It’s too normal out there. So Bush must be the winner.
I’m not going to sequester myself like I did yesterday. I’m leaving my office door open. But I will continue to avoid certain web sites. I will not peek. I will be the Master of My News Domain!
Thursday, 1:45pm. At the end of my Dynamic Meteorology class the professor said something about how he thought of writing in “Vorticity” on the ballot for president (I didn’t hear the beginning of the conversation). The guy next to me groaned, “I’ll take anybody but George.”
That is not something you say if John Kerry won! When combined with the other clues I’ve picked up, I think I can safely conclude that George Bush won the 2004 presidential election. This takes me officially out of the 2004 Presidential Challenge at 1:45pm.
If one can make it safely through the initial news blast the game gets easier. I think I’ll keep on ignoring the news just for the heck of it. I’ll let you all know when and how I get full-fledged confirmation.
If you want to relate your own experience in playing the 2004 Presidential Election Challenge, please enter them as Comments for this entry. Thanks for playing!
Posts Tagged 2004 Election Challange
Here’s the challenge: Avoid learning who won the presidential election for as long as possible.
In 2000 I managed to make it for a whole month! But that was an exceptional year.
I think the networks will avoid projecting the winner until sometime late on Election Night, so Tuesday should be pretty easy. Wednesday will be more difficult. I have to avoid the newspaper, the radio, the Internet, and of course TV. But I have some meetings at work during the day, and probably somebody will spill the beans then. I’ll request my wife’s forbearance in telling me who won, although Christine is keenly interested in the outcome. My guess is that I’ll make it until Wednesday about noon.
Who else wants to participate? Come on! Everyone who reads this blog is a news junkie, so it will require all your restraint. But you don’t really have to know right away! You can do your job and go about your daily life for a few days without knowing who is going to be our next (or continuing) president. How far do you think you can make it? Until Thursday? If you decide to go on a backpacking trip in November just to avoid finding out, you deserve to win the challenge.
You’re out of the game when you know that you know who won. I will post a follow-up entry when I find out. I will note the exact local time, and exactly how I accidentally found out. If you want to play, you can post similar information in the Comments section of that future entry. If you have to ask “What’s the point of this?”, you probably aren’t the right person to play.
I’m going out now. You will not hear from me until we meet again on the other side of that Great Divide . . .
