Archive for category Me

TMI

I hate to admit it, but it’s a plain fact: I like musicals. Stage musicals, movie musicals, it doesn’t matter. When I get two spare moments together, I want to see Chicago with my wife. I loved Moulin Rouge. I was once a season ticket holder to the Muny and Stages (before kids). Heck, I even liked Cop Rock, Steve Bochco’s only flop. I like the way people just broke out in song as naturally as breathing. I’d like to just break out in song at the drop of a hat myself, but only control myself because I’m such a poor singer. My infirmity hides my eccentricity. I only sing in church, where people have to be nice, or alone in my car, where people don’t hear.

But wait, there’s more. I’ve started to listen to show tunes at work. I bought my wife both soundtracks for Joseph and his Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, and I’ve taken to listening to the Donny Osmond version over headphones at work. Usually I follow it with Joe Satriani’s Dancing with the Alien or Yes’s Tales from Topographical Oceans to reassure myself of my manhood. But I definitely have more fun listening to Joseph. If you see me buying Showboat on either DVD or CD, then please, please, start the intervention.

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First Day Of Spring

I don’t care what the calendar says, today is the first day of spring. My crocus have burst into glorious bloom, and there was even a honeybee busy gathering pollen. I hope this means the honeybees are finally making a comeback against the mites that almost wiped them out. It feels like spring — warm and sunny with the wind roaring through the leafless trees. This morning we were out delivering Girl Scout cookies. After selling them in the depths of winter, and an especially cold and snowy winter, I was happy to get to visit the neighbors in a short sleeve shirt. Days like today make winter worthwhile.

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Haircut Musings

I, along with the Fruit of the Murphy Loins, got my hair cut last night. I’ve reached that age where not only do they trim the stuff on my head, but they cut back the thicket sprouting from my ears and even clipped the rogues trying to escape from my eyebrows. My son once looked in my ears and remarked “now I know why you can’t hear, all that hair blocks the sound.” Hey kid, can you guess why I get short of breath easily?

I have to add male hair to the list of evolutionary puzzles along with menstruation and painful childbirth. As I get older, hair grows best where I need it least. Long after I’ve passed on my genes, it sprouts in new places that certainly provide me no survival advantages, only embarrassment. It’s changing from virile to pelt and has adopted the Star Trek motto: To explore strange new patches of skin … to seek out new places and new growth … to boldly go where no hair has gone before. And please, “it hides the wrinkles” isn’t an answer to the puzzle.

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My Demographic Has Taken Over

The music of Led Zeppelin is used to sell Cadillacs; The Who and Heart is used by Nissan; Mountain Dew picked Queen; Office Depot figures BTO (Bachman Turner Overdrive, which was what was left when Burton Cummings left The Guess Who) can move product; Nortel is trying to sell with John Lennon and David Bowie. Movies aren’t just comic book like anymore – they increasingly are adaptions of comics. I used to think Superman and Batman were just a phase, but Marvel is fighting back – X-Men, Spiderman, Daredevil, the Hulk. (BTW, if you’re interested in buying comics from the eighties, let me know). And video games are a bigger business (8 Billion) than movies (6 Billion). It’s obvious that my demographic has finally filtered up to the boardroom and taken over.

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How I Look At The World

I’m an incrementalist – bet you weren’t ready for that. OK, what I mean is that I’m not looking for perfection, I’m looking for things to get better, realizing that all choices have pros and cons. It’s like an optometrist checking your eyes – they keep giving you choices between two lenses- “is this better, or that?” And since I’ve hit the down slope after 40, I have to balance my near and distant vision. If I go for 20/15 with my contacts, there goes reading menus in romantic restaurants. Even bifocals are a comprimise. And that’s life. You’ll thank me later for saving you a hike up a mountaintop.

Kevin Murphy the lesser

There are a lot of Kevin Murphys out there. While not as common as John Smith, the name, as a simple google search will show, has become common. Murphy has always been as common as dirt, but Kevin has enjoyed a surge in popularity after I was born. When I was growing up, I only knew of two other Kevin’s (OK, 3 if you count St. Kevin, patron saint of blackbirds) but now we’re everywhere – I once got an IM from a Kevin Murphy (back in my AOL days) who thought the mutual name was cause for some sort of celebration. There are three Kevin Murphy’s who work for the same large company I do, which I know because as I’m listed first in the email directory, I get a lot of their email. Anyway, my referrer logs indicate that somebody came here looking for “Kevin Murphy” “the lesser”, and apparently they found him. Kevin Murphy “the greater”, according to Google, is a doctor in British Columbia. It’s hard to argue, but I can work on being Kevin Murphy the wise, or Kevin Murphy Supreme Commander, or Kevin Murphy one hot tamale.

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My Absence

Last week during the day I was in class learning C++. At night I worked on the bathroom. That’s pretty much what I did all week. The C++ class was a lot of fun to start with, but all day learning is hard on an old man. By the end of the week I was mentally ground down and having trouble with the in class exercises.

We had our bathroom redone – new tile floor, new countertop, new shower enclosure. I was going to do the easy part of removing the old paper and replacing it with venetian plaster. The paper had already curled at every edge and looked like no problem to remove the rest of the way. Twelve hours later, it was gone. The previous owners of our house had expanded the bathroom. When they did, they put up the wall paper before finishing the bathroom, so it goes behind the countertops, cabinets, mirrors, the window and door trim, and even the jacuzzi tub. I had to take a utility knife to it to remove it cleanly. Then came the venetian plaster — the first coat didn’t match the color we wanted, so the second coat was a different, lighter color (which was a closer match, but no where near exact). It took about 6 hours for one coat, since it wall all applied by trowel. Yes, my wrists have stopped hurting. At least the third coat (the top coat) took only one night. Saturday morning I started the sanding and burnishing. Fortunately I stepped back to examine my handiwork before doing too much of it. Imagine the agony of disappointment when my work looked only vaguely like what was in the brochure. Yes, in certain locations it had that polished marbled look, but only if you were about six inches away. If you were at a reasonable viewing distance, it looked like a very poor paint job. There was no joy in mudville. So now we’re considering what color paint to use. I like our bathroom a lot, but I want to spend a lot less time in it.

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Thoughts While Removing Wallpaper

Last night while stripping wallpaper, the name Saxby Chambliss kept going through my mind. I think that’s the real reason he won (Senator from Georgia) — once you hear the name, you can’t get it out of your head. And it kept echoing off Boothby – the groundskeeper at Starfleet Academy played by My Favorite Martian, Ray Walston. Saxby, meet Boothby. Boothby, meet Saxby. Now get outta my head (and stay outta my car, too)!

The Glorious Blaze of Fall

The leaves started turning color this week. It started, as it usually does, with the hard maples, and has begun to spread to the dogwood. The sycamores are just looking sick, and the oaks haven’t changed a bit. The weather this summer was hot and dry, and it seemed the longer summer went on, the hotter and dryer it got. I don’t expect a great color this year; many of the trees have started dropping without even changing. But even a poor year is still beautiful, and for those of us who love fall, it really is one of the highlights of the season. I was amazed when I discovered that only in North America and East Asia due the trees change color in the fall; it was in a garden book that recommended not planting European trees if you wanted fall color because they didn’t provide much of a display.

As long as I’m talking about gardening, I want to brag about my pumpkins. This year the vine that volunteered from last year’s seeds was enormous and threatened to take over the front yard; the neighbors would discreetly enquire about it when we ran into them. I’ve gotten a big and little pumpkin off it already, and there’s another one just starting to grow. Yeah, we’re in touch with nature here at funmurphys.

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Better Never Than Late

Early last month when my wife wasn’t working, the power went off during the day. Our electric company, Ameren-UE, said it was a pre-planned outage and that we should have been notified in advance. Well, we got our notification yesterday — only a month late. Thanks for nothing, Ameren-UE. Can I pay the next bill a month late?